


When Love is Right

by RaggsEnriches



Category: Charité | Charité at War (TV)
Genre: 1957 east germany, Domestic, Fluff, M/M, Mostly Fluff, Paragraph 175, Period-Typical Homophobia, communism? - Freeform, historical fiction - Freeform, pride month, slight angst, so domestic, this turned into a history lesson for me
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-08
Updated: 2020-06-08
Packaged: 2021-03-04 02:54:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,693
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24596350
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RaggsEnriches/pseuds/RaggsEnriches
Summary: Martin had never pictured a day where he was finally free.
Relationships: Otto Marquardt/Martin Schelling
Comments: 5
Kudos: 20





	When Love is Right

**Author's Note:**

> I don’t really know where to begin with this one. I wanted to post something because it’s Pride month, and I had this idea while in bed a couple of nights ago, and then it really got me carried away because I spent the first day researching so much rather unnecessary information, certain details of which I have provided at the end. Since this takes place in '57, you can safely assume Martin and Otto are definitely nearing or are middle-aged. This is definitely the longest story I’ve written about Martin and Otto so far, and! and there might be a second chapter if I can think of enough to write to carry on (although I do enjoy brevity with these two).  
> 
> 
> I’d also like to mention that even though I rarely reply to comments, each and every one I’ve gotten from this fandom in particular continue to motivate me to write more for Charite (and all kudos too) so thank you if you have commented on/given kudos for any of my pieces for this tiny precious fandom.

“Martin! Martin, come quick!”  


The knife fell to the cutting board as he rushed to leave the kitchen, the nervous excitement - or was it terror? - in Otto’s voice triggering Martin’s protective instincts. His now-frantic mind raced through all of the possibilities as he rushed to the sitting room, almost losing his balance as he came around the corner.  


What could have happened now?  


Otto greeted him in the doorway, arms wrapping around his waist and mouth placing a solid kiss on Martin’s lips before he had the ability to say a word.  


“What -” He stuttered, Otto pulling away before he had the ability to properly react to the sudden onslaught of physical affection.  


“Listen! Look!” said the younger man, excited as a child on Christmas morning.  


Their television set was on, as it so often was these days (on their lazy evenings), and the newsmen sat behind their desk with their papers clutched in their hands. One man was speaking as Otto dragged Martin to the couch.  


“... 175 is the most recent repeal we’ve seen emerge from the court. A representative from the Kammergericht stated that ‘all punishments deriving from the old form of Paragraph 175’ are to be suspended because of ‘the insignificance of the acts to which it applied’. Following this statement, we reached out to First Secretary Walter Ulbricht who claimed that the recent change in criminal code had determined such acts were of ‘no danger’ to socialist society.”  


Martin felt the air leave his lungs in the sweeping relief that consumed him as he listened. He was incredibly grateful to be sitting down.  


“It’s over.” whispered the nurse. Otto’s grip on his left hand tightened. “They can no longer punish us… oh, Otto,”  


He finally tore his gaze from the screen where the broadcasters had changed topics to see the tears in Otto’s eyes. Similar tears collected in his own eyes as the realization slowly dawned on him.  


The younger man smiled weakly when he caught Martin’s gaze. All Martin could do was pull Otto into an embrace, burrowing his face into the collar of Otto’s shirt. It was Otto who broke the embrace ever so slightly, those blue eyes still glassy with unshed tears.  


“I called you in for a good reason, see?” said Otto, voice wavering.  


“I almost chopped my finger off.” he teased lightly.  


“A finger is hardly that important.”  


“It is?” said Martin, raising an eyebrow. The other man blushed lightly, for he knew well what fingers were capable of.  


“In the face of what little freedom we’ve been granted today, Martin, a finger is such a minor part.”  


They lapsed into a silence broken only by the noise of the news report behind them, the whole world becoming increasingly insignificant to Martin as he analyzed Otto’s face, tucking away all the details into memory as best he could. It might have remained like that for hours - the two of them, curled up on the couch together, eyes only for the other - if Otto hadn’t smiled his crooked, wicked little smile and pulled Martin in for a deeper kiss than before.  


This time Martin had time to respond. This time he let his free hand land somewhere near Otto’s hip and hold on tight. This time he lost himself to the taste of a man he loved, a man who he could continue to love without the threat of jail or torture shadowing them for the rest of their lives.  


It was a kiss that lacked the urgency all of their kisses had held since that first night in Martin’s old flat. A certain sense of relaxation, something he had never felt before when engaging in any display of affection with any man was present. Martin felt his heart soar at that thought.  


“Perhaps we forgo dinner?” Otto said in a sultry voice as soon as they broke the kiss.  


“I nearly lost my thumb to carrots and you want to let my work go to waste? How did I ever choose you?” he replied teasingly.  


“I chose you, Martin, I’d rather you didn’t get it backwards.”  


The soaring feeling in his chest sank as he was reminded of the sliver of guilt he still felt about the decision Otto had made all those years ago in the attic. He felt his face fall. The other man raised a hand to stroke Martin’s cheek gently, shaking his head.  


“I wish you wouldn’t continue to carry that weight around with you,” he smiled very softly despite the tears of joy that still traced down his face, and Martin was struck with just how well Otto knew him.  


“You know I try, Otto, but old habits die hard. Even the ones I dearly wish would simply vanish overnight.” said Martin.  


He tried to ignore the pit as it sank to the bottom of his stomach, tried to overcome the wave of despair that threatened to drown him. Otto’s blue eyes tore into him.  


“Martin, please, we’re supposed to celebrate tonight. The past can’t touch me, or you, or us. The repeal may not mean you are pardoned, but we no longer need to live in fear. They cannot convict you again.”  


The pit slowly dissolved, the reassuring gaze on Otto’s face giving Martin a strangely new sense of comfort.  


“We are safe.” said Otto.  


Safe was a strong word used lightly and rarely within this household. The words broke something in Martin and he let out a gasp of air he hadn’t known was trapped in his lungs. For the first time in 15 years, their relationship was not a threat to their lives.  


His sigh was met with a content smile, the wide one Otto rarely showed in public. Martin did not hesitate to lean back in for another kiss. This time he enjoyed it’s languid progress, the fear quieting back down in his stomach as his hand gripped Otto’s shirt.  


“Perhaps we should move this to a more comfortable location?” Martin spoke gently through his teeth, not desiring to break any of their contact.  


“I would hate to distract you.” said Otto.  


It was then that Martin realized he was trying to tug Otto’s shirt off with his scrabbling fingers. The euphoria of the moment had nearly blinded him to his own behavior.  


“Given the fact that you’ve committed to the idea of forsaking the carrots, and instead become dedicated to getting to bed, can the set at least be turned off?” He asked it with as little annoyance as he could muster.  


Otto pulled away slowly, moving to disconnect the television. When he returned, he forced Martin to lay beneath him, finally getting his shirt off and throwing Martin’s to the floor with it.  


And Martin could only watch the younger man softly before succumbing to the oh-so-familiar feeling of Otto’s mouth on his neck. Without uttering a word, Otto made it very clear this night was all about Martin.

  
  


Neues Deutschland displayed the bolded words below the fold the next morning.  


‘Paragraph 175: Repealed’ was all it said. Martin did not care to read the article below, knowing it would only tell him what he already knew. Instead, he let the paper fall to the table and set to work on a small breakfast of eggs and toast.  


Otto lay snoring on the couch right where they’d ended up sleeping. On mornings such as these where Martin was headed to work early, he refrained from waking the other man up. Their shifts matched only a couple of times a week and Martin was not going to let the late night Otto had in front of him be ruined by exhaustion.  


At least, that was what Martin intended to do, until strong arms wrapped around his chest and a head came to lie on his shoulder where he stood against the counter, coffee in one hand, fork in the other.  


“I think I might write to Anni,” said Otto.  


“You should be sleeping.”  


“And miss the chance to tell you that I intend to alert my entire family to the fantastic news?” Martin could feel Otto shaking his head against his neck.  


“What will you tell her?” said Martin with a small smile, sipping his coffee gently.  


“That we’re going to have a very long family discussion about it.”  


“When will that happen?” Martin put his cup down and turned in Otto’s arms.  


“As soon as she is able to visit next, of course, and I will demand she bring Karin with her.” replied Otto, pressing his forehead against Martin’s. “Then we can celebrate together.”  


“I’m grateful I found someone who was willing to plan more often than I.”  


“Someone has to keep you connected to the rest of the world.” said Otto.  


He laughed gently and let his lips briefly slide over Otto’s. Martin was well aware of his general hermit-like existence in the past, something Otto rarely let him forget despite knowing that all of the emotional walls were a method of staying safe. They were what stopped anyone from being hurt - of course, until Otto showed up and tore them down with a smile and a hammer.  


“I have to go connect with my coworkers,” He mumbled when Otto pressed forward to capture a real kiss.  


Otto breathed a soft whine when he pulled away and moved towards the door.  


“I’ll see you there,” said Martin, pulling his shoes on before giving Otto another chaste kiss and a small smile. “Write that letter to Anni before you go back to sleep.”

  
  


The general atmosphere of the Charite was charged with a nervous energy Martin had felt many times in the years since the war, but this time he was finding it increasingly difficult to focus on his job whenever head nurses and doctors sent each other or him looks.  


Some even spoke in hushed tones as they cleaned their hands at the sinks after a routine surgery. Others huddled around the ends of patients’ beds with their heads together, mumbling with discontent. He avoided everyone as best he could for the first half of the day, only breaking his silence to discuss patients. It was Hilda Dietrich who caught him in a supply closet midday.  


“Do you watch the news?” she asked.  


“As often as any respectable citizen.” Martin answered, mindful to keep his tone even.  


“That means you know about the repeal.” Hilda glanced upward. Her face was twisted in the dim light. “Everyone’s been talking about it. Truthfully I don’t rightly know how to feel, I mean, obviously it’s immoral, but if our leaders believe in it…”  


Martin paused his search for the right cotton swabs.  


“If they do not believe it will be an issue, we should believe the same.” He said it despite the knowledge that following a government with all one’s heart was a foolish endeavor that never ended well.  


“Someone else suggested that as well,” Hilda said. “Perhaps it will have no effect on our welfare.”  


“I doubt very much any effect will be seen.”  


“Well, no matter what they should say, all it means is we must be more careful in avoiding suspect men.”  


“You know,” he said looking up at her, “I think the general public will be safe from the woes of the homosexual.”  


Without another word to her slightly astonished face, Martin picked up his supplies from the table they were stacked on and marched out of the room. A small smile crossed his face as he traveled down the corridor to the theatre.. It had been quite a while since he’d spoken to someone like that, an action not taken since the days of Nurse Christel and war, and this time he knew the argument was won.  


The preparation room beside the theatre was silent, dirty clothing piled into their assigned laundry baskets and sinks drying from excessive use. Martin took his time placing the iodine, swabs, sewing kit and bandages in the cupboard. He hummed random tunes, dwelling in the calm satisfaction that was spreading over his body.  


Otto was, by all accounts, right in claiming they were free. The people in their world knew there was nothing more to be done about people like Martin. No longer could they conduct unfair trials or make the claim that the life he lived with Otto deserved to rot in prison.  


It was the first time since the announcement was made that Martin truly, genuinely, believed he was free.  


“Are you thinking about me?” said a voice from behind him, and there was Otto with a knowing smile on his face.  


“You’ve got to stop sneaking up on me like that.” Martin tried to hide his surprise at this behind his joy at seeing Otto standing there against a counter. “You can tell?”  


“And ruin the chance to ever see your surprised face again? I thought perhaps you’d noticed how long I’ve been spending time with you by now, Martin.” replied Otto. “I know your expressions like the back of my own hand - including the one when you’re thinking deeply about me.”  


“If you know me so well, you’d know exactly what I’m thinking about you right now.” He said, closing the cabinet and turning to face Otto.  


“I think I can guess,” The younger man drew closer. Martin’s head connected with the wall as he backed away.  


They never stood this close in public. His heart began to thump as those blue eyes flicked over his features with an expression of interest normally reserved to their bedroom.  


“Martin, they can’t stop us.” said Otto.  


“They certainly would want to if anyone found us in here.” Martin replied with a small sigh, eyes falling to the ground.  


Otto’s hands landed on his shoulders, “If anyone comes in here, I won’t let them say a word.”  


He wanted to argue that there were far better places to entertain one another in, such as the closet in the west wing where they’d become frequent guests back in their earliest days. Martin wanted to say that they’d barely managed to keep their jobs the first time they’d fallen under suspicion and Sauerbruch was the main reason they’d been able to stay on after the war ended. Who’s to say they couldn’t become unemployed for being who they were now?  


“Martin? Martin, calm down, I promise we can go somewhere more private.”  


Otto was watching him nervously, eyes no longer filled with that desire Martin so enjoyed seeing. The violent gasps for air he found himself making were most definitely the cause of the pain etched on his lover’s face.  


“I - I’m sorry, Otto, it’s simply -” He glanced around the room before finally looking into Otto’s eyes.  


“You’re not used to it. Not to mention, we might not be jailed but I’m certain that they could still bury us in trouble.” said Otto with a sad smile.  


Oh, if only Otto Marquardt knew what it was like to watch such a bright figure grow into such an intelligent man. Martin could scarcely believe it was the same person sometimes - in the many years he’d known Otto, he’d watched while the boyish charm had been retained as the air of knowledge surrounding it arrived, a knowledge that only time could bring.  


“You’re beautiful.” Martin said quietly, hand coming to cup Otto’s cheek.  


“Ah, so flattery is now your distraction technique? You’ll be glad to know it’s working.” Otto laughed, face moving against Martin’s hand.  


“You know I mean it, liebling. You understand so much more than you believe you do.” He answered and nodded toward the door, “While I expect this room to remain empty for a while longer, we should find a better place.”  


“Of course.” Otto said.  


Martin was the one to lean in for a chaste kiss, letting go of his fears for a moment. Later they would discuss the reactions of various coworkers to the new ruling. Later Martin would tell him all of the lovely things that made Otto, Otto. Later, later, later.  


For now, their preferred supply closet made for a fantastic location to continue celebrating during the lunch hour.

**Author's Note:**

> The repeal of Paragraph 175 in East Germany did not pardon all men previously convicted and it provided little protection for homosexuals despite their now being free to love. In 2002, a supplement to the Act of Abolition of National Socialism (a.k.a. the Nazi party) was added, anulling the Nazi-era convictions of homosexuals and deserters from the Wermacht (Nazi military). In June of 2017, it was finally determined that all gay men convicted under Paragraph 175 in the post-war era were to be posthumously pardoned, and relatives were able to collect compensation on the behalf of the victims in their families.  
> 
> 
> The Allies let West Germany decide whether the law should be left in place, and in 1957, West Germany decided to continue to uphold the 1935 version until 1969 when it was finally reformed. From 1945 to 1969, around 100,000 men were indicted and 50,000 men were sent to prison.  
> 
> 
> Televisions were becoming far more popular in late 1950s East Germany, with the first and main broadcaster being the Deutscher Fernsehfunk (German Television Broadcasting). All programming run on this channel was approved by the Socialist Unity Party of Germany, meaning it was mostly propaganda. The government censored it heavily. In 1952, sets were being sold at 3500 East German Marks each. That being said, I’m not certain Martin and Otto would have realistically been able to afford a tv as it was difficult to find the wages of doctors in post-war Germany - but this is, after all, historical fiction.  
> 
> 
> The Neues Deutschland (or New Germany) was a real socialist newspaper oriented toward the communist party. I was unfortunately unable to find actual pages from any publications of it in the archive I located, so I do not know what exactly they may have reported when the repeal occurred.  
> 
> 
> West Germans were able to travel to East Germany with the right visa and after taking care of the application process that took place at the border. East Germans, as you may well know, were essentially trapped and to leave would mean to do so illegally. Berliners were a tad more restricted on their ability to cross, but Anni canonically lives in Bielefeld as opposed to West Berlin, so I went with the assumption she could get into East Berlin easily (at least up until the 80s). Chances are, she would not have heard of the repeal from anyone but Otto, given that as with any communist country that blocks itself from the rest of the world, news sources were most likely restricted to only existing within the land they applied to and therefore what went on was relatively unknown.


End file.
